It all happens so quickly
Your comments about this column are welcome ~ e-mail Ron at
founded 2004 by ron cruger
A place for intelligent writers
by Ron Cruger
A place for intelligent readers
2013 Spectator Ron - The Spectator All Rights Reserved
It all happens so very fast. One minute your parents are there providing for you. Teaching,
guiding, sacrificing. You take for granted that they’ll be there the next day and the day after that. Then one day they’re not there.
It all happens so quickly.
You can never be ready for their absence. It seems like they
were always there. You were used to them. They got old before your eyes, but you always saw them at a particular age. You didn’t catch
on when their hair turned grey. You barely noticed when they gained a few pounds and started wearing eye glasses.
The years flew by. It was all so swift. You did notice when dad started walking with a slight limp. When his posture wasn’t so erect.
When his hair thinned. He complained about his aches and pains, but that wasn’t important to you then – you had your own problems.
Mom and dad were getting tired at the end of the day. They wanted to sit and rest.
You were advancing. Your life. Your career. Marriage, children. You knew your parents were getting older, but you were busy. Success,
Then one day they weren’t there. Gone. Suddenly the questions come to mind.
How did you both feel when you first met? Was it love at first sight? Was it a problem
with dad being Irish Catholic and mom being Jewish? What did the family say?
What did you
do on your dates? Were you both madly in love?
Did you plan for me and my sister? How did
you feel when we were born? What kind of parents were you? Were we good babies?
Gram come live with us? Did it bother you when she moved in?
What did you feel when your
parents died? How did you act? Were you close to your brothers and sisters?
What jobs did
dad have? Did you like the jobs? Did mom work? Did Gram baby sit for us?
Was life easy
for you? Did you get along with the rest of the family?
Did you stay in love with each
other? Did your feelings change? Were you always glad you married each other?
Did you ever
consider separating or divorce? What did you like to do on weekends? Were you each other’s best friend?
Did you like being parents? Did you love us? What changed as you got older? Did you go on vacations? Did you have enough money?
What thoughts did you have as you aged? Were you fearful about growing older?
Did you go
to the doctor for regular check ups? Dentist?
Did your dreams come true – the ones
you had when you were both young?
Did you feel that life was good to you?
What did you feel, mom, when the doctor told you it was cancer? Dad, what did you feel when the doctor said your heart was failing?
Did you believe in God?
I have so many more